Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Monday, October 10, 2011

What Would Steve Jobs Do?





Something wrong, I hold my head, S.J. gone ...that geek dead.

Like the time you had your first kiss or where you were when you heard the King of Pop died. Everyone will always remember where  they were or what they were doing the Master of the Mac went to that ride on Processor Highway up to the big CPU in the sky.

What was that? Where was I you ask?

Good question. I was actually perusing the internet, on a slim and sleek Mac Book Pro, searching for accent pillows for my couch to match the color of  the walls in my living room ( Yes this O.G. watches H.G.T.V).  Then I stumbled across the headline “Apple Co-founder dies at 56”  The funny part is ...I don’t own a Mac. This just goes to show how successful Steve Jobs was at intergrating Apple into every facet of our lives.

There are plenty of things worth remembering about Steve Jobs. But probably the one most worth noting is that Jobs gave us the authority to design and control our own shit.

In our Age thinking for yourself is considered odd or a mistake. We constantly reinforce the need to fit into a bottle. Much of our instinctive creativity that we are born with is stifled. We start our dreaming, pretending and creating; and end up crunching numbers making up excuses and taking half hour lunch breaks. Amongst the stress from our professors, bosses, and even family members, many of us throw in the towel in search of our meaning and purpose in life. Because we like to follow the herd. Fuck that. And after some time, some of  us start  to doubt that we actually have something unique to offer the world  

When we try and measure ourselves by others standards; Its like the kid in the Volkswagen commercial wacking at the pinata with all his might and not even putting a dent in the damn thing. (c'mon you know the advertisement I'm talking about).. but its pointless..



Some time after Jobs 30th birthday, Apple relieved him of his duties as CEO. Upon his return Job initiated an ad campaign that pretty much sums up his belief and approach to life. 



So lets give three cheers for the guy that taught us not to conform to what others think. Figure out your own importance to this world and find a way to make a difference.

I am We.


Monday, October 3, 2011 2 comments

The Fresh Hair Cut Effect


 "The Black MansCountry Club"
Every week or two, I find myself seated in an old leathery black chair with a light black cloth draped around my shoulders. With sweat slowly dripping down my brow from the lack of centralized air in the room. Infused with the boisterous sounds of drums, horns and the melodic tunes of the Caribbean playing from a huge but, out-of-date wall speaker. While dozens of men holler and banter back and forth on such riveting subjects as, Nicki Minaj’s ass, Why Michael Vick shouldn’t play this week, the latest Chrysler 300 model, and Nicki Minaj’s Ass... again...

If you haven’t guess by now, this is my Barbershop. “The Black Man’s Country Club,” if you will. Now I realize everyone’s experience might not be as prestigious and as exceptional as mine. Haha. But whether you go to the traditional barber, Super Cuts (for my paler less pigmented friends) or your cousin Tito who cuts your hair in his garage. One thing is Universal...

                                    Fresh Haircuts Make a Man Feel GOOOOOOD!!!

And I’m not talking about the I-got -a -three –day- weekend -from work -kind –of-good. Or the, I- just- won $20- dollars- on –a- scratch off ticket -kind- of- good either. I’m talking about the, IF- KERRY WASHINGTON- HERSELF -WALKED PASSED- ME RIGHT –NOW- SHE WOULD- WANT TO HAVE- MY -CHILD, KIND –OF- GOOD! ... Just because my Fade is Tight.


Maybe I’m just speaking for myself but after a nice cut, my Smile is a little brighter, there’s a little lean in my step, and extra debonair flare in my voice. I can’t be stopped. “King Kong ain’t got nothing on me.”  A good example would be Bradley Cooper in “Limitless.” 

But with all the extra pep and energy, most of the time, it goes unnoticed by many. As Men we are quick to give out compliments to ladies. Such as “Damn girl yo’ booty so nice I wanna eat cereal out the dimples of your Ass.” Although quite obscene and highly uncalled for, We mean well...We mean well...Truly... We really mean well.

And yet this grand act of misplaced admiration is rarely returned.
So ladies, I dare you...
I triple double dog nuts dare you,
From this point on and until sweet black baby Jesus comes and takes us away (Fuck  YOU FRANK OCEAN FOR THAT BULLSHIT Ass LINE!), If you see a brother with a smooth, well maintained cut.
Say something Dammit! You never know you might get a free Gatorade or something out of it.

And fellas don’t be afraid to tell your boy he has a fresh cut. IT’S NOT GAY... It’s only Gay unless you were stroking the side of his head and gazing into his eyes while you were saying it.


 I AM WE.
 
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